Some of the things that annoy me.

Somehow, I have missed that Zombieland Double Tap is now out in theatres. I loved the first one, so I want to go and see the sequel, even if it is 10 years late. It got me thinking that there have been a few films like this lately. I wanted to see Hustlers, but it came and went, Hobbs and Shaw too. I really need to get back into going to the cinema. 

It’s well documented that I don’t watch much normal television now, it’s always a streaming service unless it’s a sport, in which case I stream it from the NFL pass or something. This means I don’t see trailers or TV spots anymore, and maybe that’s making me oblivious to the films coming out, or perhaps the films coming out just aren’t compelling me. Why doesn’t YouTube advertise films instead of web browsers and VPN’s, I’d watch the adds longer than five seconds if this was the case.

In the first half of this year I had a list of every film I wanted to see, for some reason I did not repeat that for the second half of the year, and I have seen much fewer films. That’s upsetting, because it means I have missed out on some decent films as well as bucket loads of popcorn I could have munched through. Salty is the way to go by the way. If you get a mix, I can deal with it, but just the sweet popcorn is not OK. You should consider therapy to try and correct this minor character flaw if you’re one of those people.

My most recent trip to the cinema was alone, and I enjoyed it for the most part. I saw Joker, a film about a loner who doesn’t have any friends and becomes a psychopathic killer. There I was alone, standing behind someone on the left of the escalator to the exit thinking “I understand why he turns”.  In case you’re not versed in the do’s and don’ts of escalators, stand on the right, and get a shift on and walk down on the left. It’s not hard, its basic decency. If you stand on the left, do not be surprised or upset when I push past you and give you a disappointed tut of disappointment.

You know what else annoys me, playing any kind of battle royale with other people who aren’t in my party. If I was a streamer, I would be dropping into Apex Legends with random players all the time, because I hurl insults at the dim-witted nincompoops that I seem to be regularly paired with. The idea is you drop together and search different buildings. Not drop right next to me and run into the same room. Who is that benefiting exactly? I get half my loot, and you steal half my loot when you could have had your own stuff in another place. Meanwhile our enemies are strategically sharing the loot out as they should and it’s no wonder when it comes to a firefight, I am reloading my running out of bullets in my shitty Mozambique shotgun and having to punch fools to get any kills early game.

Speaking of the Mozambique, why does that piece of limp dicked nerf shooting crap exist on Apex Legends? What role does it fill? It’s a waste of everyone’s time. The developers have spent hours crafting this weapon but forgot to make it remotely useful to anyone. I cannot think of any other guns I hate as much as that gun on other games, but the G7 Scout from Apex was a close contender for a long time. I have reconciled with the G7 since then and now appreciate what it offers, but the Mozambique is a piece of shite and anyone who says otherwise is wrong.

In case it wasn’t obvious from the random nature of this post, I am over tired today. I have started to play Fortnite with mates and somehow, with very little skill, we are nearly winning games. Most of the time we are being idiots and making jokes, but then at some point in the final game it became serious. I don’t remember the gun play on Fortnite being so good, but I really enjoyed that aspect. Normally the reason we don’t win is because the final team we must fight is Bob the Builder and his friends. We win almost every gunfight that’s not super heavy on the building side, and then as soon as someone is chucking stairs and walls left right and centre as well as shooting at us, we are done for.

We will win a game at some point, and that is when I will finally feel I can retire from Fortnite again. Ironically it will be when I am capable at the game again, which is a bit of an odd time to stop, but that’s just how I tend to play these games. I got pretty good at Apex, top 3 was the minimum, and now I have played one game in the last month just to see the new map.

I am going to have fun trying to title this one. It turned into a list of things I can’t stand but there you go. Anyway I am at a respectable amount of words now, so I will leave it here. Have a great weekend!

‘Til Monday.

ChAzJS

 

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